Where oh where is the land of milk and honey?

After spending the past few weeks dodging sickness, it finally caught me.  I had to leave work early on Friday because my stomach was not very happy with me.  Luckily, I work with some pretty amazing people and they made sure that everything was taken care of, me included.  Let me just say, being sick and away from your momma just isn’t easy.  I spent the majority of the weekend in bed…no makeup, no fixed hair, which means I was definitely not feeling well.  The students made me “Get Well” cards and they were so sweet!  I am blessed to be the teacher of such thoughtful and loving children.  I am, thank heavens, on the mend.

I will be honest, when hearing or reading Bible stories, I don’t really pay much attention to the details – who, what, where, when – I just listen for the lesson and how I can relate it to my life.  Our lesson for today (in my best teacher voice), comes from Hebrews 4.  In all seriousness, God really threw this one my way today.  Quick overview, the Israelites are about to enter the “land of milk and honey”, however, they get scared.  What comes to mind when you think of milk and honey?  Sweet, soothing, warm…positives, right?  So why would they (the Israelites), or us, get scared when God is directing us to our own “land of milk and honey?”  The only explanation I can come up with is this – we are the problem.  Why am I constantly wishing I were somewhere else, doing something else, or with someone else?  Because I like to think that I know better than Him.  God’s promises have never (and will never) change, but like the Israelites, we get in the way.  If you are anything like me, we like to walk in front of God.  I know what I want for my life; therefore, I think I can do it better than God.  When we rely on other people or other things to guide our lives, we lose trust and we doubt.  Eventually, we lose our life to human desires, rather than gaining life through God’s desires.  I feel like that is my life in a nutshell.  I have spent my life dreaming, planning, and wishing for a certain things.  It seems as if I have been so close to “it” (whatever that may be) so many times, and then it backfires and all disappears.  Why?  Because God will not allow me to proceed if I am afraid - afraid of giving it all to Him.  How do you do that? Can someone answer me that?  How do you completely place what you want aside, not saying that you could or should forget about those desires, but how do you give it all to God?  I wish I had the answer.

Much like the Israelites, we know that there is something bright ahead, but we get scared.  We get to a certain point and then we cave in.  I am so guilty of trusting to a certain point, and then falling back into lackluster faith.  How can I share my faith with others if I choose to only believe half of what I should?  The really scary realization is, if we give up and compromise our believing, we never get there; we never make it to our “land of milk and honey.”  I don’t know about you, but I want to get there and I think God wants me (and you) there too.  The key to receiving His promises, is simply this…believe.  Not that I can read God’s mind, but I am beginning to think that this whole concept of “believing” is a big reason why He brought me all the way to Honduras.  Believing in me will only get me so far, but fully believing in my God, that my friends, will you get everywhere. 

Remember your word to your servant, for you have given me hope.

My comfort in my suffering is this:

Your promise preserves my life.

Psalm 119: 49-50

Choosing to believe (or learning how to),

Lauren